So... What to Do?
I have to renew my domain... I’m seriously thinking of letting the site go. Turning it off. Killing it.
I’m not depressed. I’m in a good place. The major slump I was in a few years ago... I’m no longer ‘there’.
However, it's clear that, my politics and thoughts, being anything but tribal, simply aren’t appreciated or valued, I feel, and I really wonder whether if killing the site, it not existing, would remove any false expectations I have, no longer motivating me to spend my time in an unproductive manner, thus, pushing me toward other activities that may be more beneficial and relaxing. Would spending my free time not constantly feeling that I should be posting—and feeling guilty for not doing so—as well as disconnecting entirely from all politics, would that be more fruitful? What can I gain from being such a news junkie?
Better for one’s mental health?
In the past few months, since losing the two finished docs I hadn't yet posted, this affecting my motivation greatly for several reasons, I started writing four new ones I never finished... that says much.
I’m sick and tired of operating in a complete void. I do need tangible external motivation at times; I am human, after all.
And it certainly isn’t about the money. All my needs are more than adequately met...
But, posting. It’s a lot of time and effort. Why? What have I achieved? Why should I persist?
Not sure I see a reason anymore.
Plus, unless something motivates me otherwise, I wanna keep heading south in a few months. Make my way to Patagonia.
I know that I said in a recent post (Update. Where's Part 2 and 3?) that I’ve gotten millions of views just in 2026, and past numbers were pretty good... but this hasn't translated into a single meaningful interaction, and I do question the ‘quality’ of recent said views and have reasons to think that a click-farm is behind them, which I sure as hell didn't pay for. Who?
I’ve always wanted to just write, yet, events and shit... I’m now thinking that it simply wasn’t meant to be, or that I just don’t have the talent. I'm OK with that.
I’m not seeking pity or false interest. Far from.
Just a sign that any efforts here are worth mine and other people’s time. Does anyone actually read what I post?
You can message me at pdl[at]downmystreetandupyours.org.
If I do keep going, then this post will be taken down and I'll renew my domain and hosting service at the end of the month; if not, then the site will be up until 15-Sep, when the hosting co. will cancel my server service, and that will be that... On to other things to fill my free time.
Let me know. This site, worth the effort or not?
EDIT: Having had a deeper look at the logs and all those 'views', it seems that the huge majority may be people using my aggregator. Hard to tell as these show up as RSS entries.
That said, maybe that's what I should focus on, developing a better tool out of that, maybe challenge an app like GroundNews? The whole site has to be updated... there's much I'm not happy with or want to change, this feeding my thought that simply 'killing it' and giving up, moving on, may be the best option.
As I said, despair isn't what prompted this post. I'm just not sure my heart is into it anymore, and seriously wonder whether I'd just be better off completely disconnecting from any politics.
While riding my bike from Montreal to Nicaragua, I did disconnect fully, and...
.
